Tuesday, December 07, 2010

Picture the Holidays~December 7th

Today's Prompt:     Express Yourself
Being (and staying) balanced can often be as easy as checking in with ourselves from time to time. Tuning into our own body and mind is a simple emotional gauging tool we often overlook. Today, take a few moments to be still. Breathe in and out and just allow yourself to be and to feel. (I'll wait.)
Well? How are you today? What is your body saying? How about your mind? Your heart? Listen to the shouts and the whispers, take it all in, and then exhale. Now, get your camera and interpret those feelings.
I feel off balance most the time. I should be completely ecstatic with my life. I have what I always wanted, a daughter. But I still have the guilt of not being able to stay home and raise her myself. I have the guilt of not being able to give her 100% of me because I have all these other responsibilities. I didn't know with motherhood you basically always have a guilt about something. I know she's to the point that she is going to start requesting to go certain places such as Papa's and Mama's when she could be home with me and I'm going to have to let go and let her grow up. But I just want her to stay mine for right now and a little longer! Is that so bad?
I have an absolute awesome job but I still don't want to work. That makes me off balance. If I didn't work, we would be so strapped for money it wouldn't even be funny. And I wouldn't have my time to do stuff such as this blog or this class.
With parenthood comes so much confusion and so much joy! I think that in itself is a little off-kilter.

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